EPISODE 3: CODEPENDENCY

WHAT IS CODEPENDENCY

• Oxford dictionary definition is excessive emotional or psychological reliant on a partner.

• Also mentions that it is typically one who requires support of an addiction or illness.

CODEPENDENCY WITHIN MYSELF

• I notice it within myself (i.e. I'm usually with/around the same 2 people)

• I notice codependency habits:

- I try to find the route of the these habits.

-its usually because it takes me awhile to trust someone and those I trust already, I'm

already around.

-It stems from anxiety.

-my people know I'm codpendent and that I'm working on it.

SIGNS OF CODEPENDENCY

• difficulty making decisions

• difficulty identifying feelings

• difficulty communicating

• poor self esteem

• fear of abandonment/obsessive need for approval

• lacking trust in yourself

• valuing the approval of others more than yourself

NOT ALL CODEPENDENCY IS BAD

• Having some codependency in relationships is normal

HOW I DEAL WITH MY CODEPENDENCY WHEN/HOW I REALIZED I WAS:

• Took notice to the fact that I have a lot of friends, but I constantly needed those 2-3 friends with me.

-DISCLAIMER: I'm not saying that this isnt ok or normal but for me I got/get "too

attached" to certain people and that stems into my codependency.

• Noticed that I could be too over protective

• I have a hard time expressing my feelings especially with those people I am codependent on.

-because I don't want to hurt them or get myself hurt.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU'RE CODEPENDENT:

• I listed some signs of codependency earlier

• There are 4 themes:

-self sacrifice

-tendency to focus on others

-a need for control, which may fuel conflict.

-difficulty recognizing and expressing emotions.

• Healthy dependence means you:

-state needs and desires

-ask for support when you find yourself struggling

-feel safe and comfortable expressing your own needs

-letting others know when they're asking too much of you without worrying they'll reject

you

SUPPORT FOR CODEPENDENCY

• Codependency is a learned behavior, so it's something that you can unlearn.

• If left without being addressed codependency can lead to:

-anxiety/depression

-feeling empty

-sense of powerlessness or helpless

-diminished self esteem

-hopeless

-burnout

• Recognizing codependency isn't always as straightforward.

-seeing a mental health professional can offer:

*recogniztion of key signs

*overcoming people-pleasing tendencies

*addressing related mental health issues

*reconnecting with yourself

*setting healthy boundries

• If therapy doesn't feel right or isn't accessible for one right away, try these strategies:

-spend time alone

*get in touch with your emotions

*reflect on daily experiences

*recharge your energy

*practice healthy self care

-pursing interests

*establishing greater self-awareness is a large part of overcoming codependency